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Montreal Files Released Fifteen Years after Freedom from Movement
This month, January 2007, marks 15 years since I left the Movement officially and for the last time. I have never had any thoughts of returning, neither any regrets about having self-excluded. Thinking back over all these years, I'm proud of myself for what I have accomplished with my life since then and how I have been able to help others. My regrets are for the lack of quality services available to cult survivors in Canada, especially in the backward province of Quebec. For any progress I have made and any peace I have today, I built it myself and with a little help from my friends. I made my own progress while inventing my own therapies, for society was scarcely interested in my spiritual evolution and justice was denied to me regularly and unfairly every time I sought it.Usually at this time of the year, I have a little celebration or ritual of some kind to mark my freedom. It may be a telephone call to a special friend, or an afternoon tea spent reflecting on those who were left behind in the Movement. This year, I feel a great deal of personal satisfaction, in part for this web site, and feel that I mark my time less by how many years I have been out and more by my own personal and professional dreams, not the least of which includes the publication of my book, Lies My Guru Told Me.
I am also taking this occasion to release my personal notes, which I took in the meetings of Enrique's team, 1-Xi-Phenix, back in the years 1990 to 1992. While reading these notes today, I strain to recall who these people were or what was so interesting about the meetings that would make me want to be in the Movement? It is about as difficult a task today as explaining the Movement to any curious person who might have asked at the time. The magical effects that were produced back then no longer have any echo of an influence on me. Rather, these old recordings have receded into the sands of time along with the faces and names ofcountless young people who were sexually harassed, exploited, recycled and discarded by the Siloists. In fact, Enrique's meetings seem so utterly pointless to me today, I must have been hypnotised not to notice the destructive harm they were doing to me.
I leave you with my personal meeting notes which, combined with other materials I present on this web site, may inform your view of Siloism.The transcriptions were done just as they appeared on the written page, in English, French and sometimes Spanish. If there was a drawing on the page, it is indicated in [squarebrackets]. In addition to Enrique's monologues and sermons, I offer notes from meetings I attended in Chile, or with Marie-Claire Desroches at her Admi seminars and also when Daniel Zuckerbrot was in town. In all cases, the speaker's name is indicated along with the people in attendance.
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